Recently, I've lost something. It was the last, fragile string that was connecting me to childhood. And now that it's gone, I'm not really sure where to go from here. What happens now? What's the next step into adulthood? I know I'm over-analyzing... Like I always do. Did I do this wrong? Am I out of the regular order of things? I know that growing up is a part of life, but I don't think I'm ready... And I'm getting forced into a world that I'm still scared to death of. Growing up is inevitable. We all have to do it.
I'm not saying I'm regretting things. I have very little regrets. I'm just not ready to be mature and take responsibility :P I like the familiar. I miss the old. Nostalgia. At times I find myself wishing I could go back a week, a month, a year, maybe a few years. To a time that made more sense. A time that WAS simple. A time when waking up early for Saturday morning cartoons was what I looked forward to all week.
I guess growing up isn't necessarily what I'm scared of. It's just that darn change. And it's not that I want to stay young forever. I just want to go back to the places I went when I was young and see the same things. I want my children to play the same games at the same parks with the same toys. I know this is really weird, but I really did have a great childhood (not perfect, mind you, but good enough)... When things get hard, I find myself wanting to blink my eyes and go back there . Again, simplicity is all I want. The kind of simplicity that's only found in the innocents of a child's mind.
No comments:
Post a Comment