You Can Break Everything I am, Like I'm Made of Glass

I don't really know who I am or why some things upset me. I'm not even sure if things really do upset me, or if I just have nothing else to think about. But I really do feel fragile lately. The smallest things can make me want to burst into tears. The smallest comment can make me wonder if I'm worth it. I'm not trying to get pity, or wanting everyone to tell me how wonderful I really am. All I'm trying to put out there is that life is hard enough without having to deal with rude people. It makes it really hard to go on with everyday life when you're constantly being hit with the negligent actions of others. Careless words and hurtful remarks. It's like my happiness depends on how other's treat me. I feel like every time I have a good day, the next day is doubly bad. It's like my bad luck piles up until it drops on me all at once. I can't have a good day without waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I'm really so over letting other's affect me. But I don't know how to not let it get to me. I know that I need to have control over my own life, I just can't when I'm so insecure. That's why I'm so crazy all the time. I just pretend I'm okay with getting teased all the time, getting hurt. When really I feel like I'm falling apart. I don't like to tell others that because I don't want them to know that they have that kind of power over me. Again, not looking for pity, just sayin'. I try to be a good person and be nice to everyone. You know, you never know when your smile will brighten someones day, and all that? Reach out to others to help, you never know when they're going through a hard time. It's just hard to be nice and reach out, when other's don't return the favor. When no one reaches out to you. Moral of the story: Life throws nasty curve balls, and it sucks. And, honestly, I don't really like it.